Shalom bitches 

It was a long flight but good in that we took off and landed with no drama (scorpion and drag free). My neighbor on the New Jersey leg in the middle was from Chicago and I didn’t get his name cause that’s what I do (or don’t do?).

10.5 hours of watching movies (The Accountant, Inferno, X-Men) and I eventually squeezed in three one-hour naps only to wake up over the Mediterranean Sea! After that awesomeness, you notice all these white buildings and I guess that’s why they call this The White City. Also, lots of green fields. You don’t get that in DFW!


We landed at 16:20 in the baller ass airport Ben Gurion. Shits like crazy nice. I had to try and hustle through customs cause I booked a shuttle service and I needed to be there by 17:00. Luckily for me it was packed as hell so I spent my 20 minutes in line, using my time productively worrying about not making my scheduled shuttle and then remembering to not worry because that doesn’t help anything. Then worrying for no reason anyway. 


Walking outside, I’m not sure why but I was expecting, hoping, to enjoy some refreshing, sweet Israeli air and I all got was cigarette smoke, body odor, and some pollution. Yeah! 


I like airports. I think they’re cool because everyone walks around lost, happy, sad, or angry. There’s also lots of kids running off making parents chase after them.


Leaving the airport, you hear lots of horns honking and that lights turn yellow right before they turn green and everyone takes off on yellow. 

I get checked in to my hotel and having nothing to better do, I walked a block over to check out the Mediterranean in person. But not really, it’s a no-swimming zone so I just rolled by kept on pursuing to the next block. 


Which ended up being the Illegal Immigration Memorial. I didn’t know it but during World War II, Jews fleeing whatever hellhole they were in were trying to get to Palestine. The monument was where on the shops landed and were fired upon by the British. 


Just a few feet away was this bar called Mike’s Place. Apparently it’s a giant tourist trap but man did it feel like a bar at home. Cheap drinks, 80s music, and cheap drinks! Also anyone you tell that your going to Tel Aviv will let you know to go here.  Feels like an American bar. 


I don’t remember much but I ate some #shawarma from a place open just around the corner. 

babby’s first shawarma

Then I woke up to ten missed phone calls over twenty minutes from Kham and the front desk. Uh….my bad dude. 

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